Plinky asks, “Have you ever been on stage?”

Why yes, Plinky, I have indeed been on stage once or twice, despite my penchant for shyness around lots of people. Let me share some of the best moments:

1) My first time going onstage not to receive a Books & Beyond award in elementary school (I read a lot) was at the illustrious Mechanics Hall in downtown Worcester, MA. I went on countless field trips here as a kid, and one time got picked to hop up onstage to take part in a random performance. I forget if it was 3rd, 4th, or 5th grade… I’m leaning toward 5th… but the show centered on this guy who sang songs about the environment and diversity, etc. I got to hold up the “L” sign in his aptly titled song “Ecology” while some of my classmates were quickly taught ridiculously complicated clapping routines to accompany the song. It was weird.

2) In 8th grade, I was part of the not-so-illustrious “Chorus 2” in my middle school’s production of Leader of the Pack. Chorus 2 was where the musical director stuck all the kids who couldn’t sing or act, since no one was allowed to be cut from the cast in middle school. I got to wear 1960s-era clothes, plus more makeup than I’ve ever worn any other time in my life, and sing and dance to hits such as “Be My Baby,” “Do Wah Diddy,” and “Chapel of Love.” I also got pretty good at dancing the Hanky Panky, but sadly all those moves have escaped from my memory.

3) During a random fit of inspiration to participate in as many diverse things as possible during my sophomore year of college (the year in which I played indoor soccer for the first time, wrote sporadically for the school paper, and several other things), I tried out for a small production of the third act of Our Town, and landed the role of dead Mrs. Gibbs. (With my track record of being pegged as a bad actor – see above – I was pretty pumped that I was actually given a significant speaking role). It was a pretty fun experience, and also occurred right before my hatred for all-things theatre developed fully, so I’m glad I was able to sneak it in there.

There you have it, Plinky… evidence of my brief history as a thespian. They say nature abhors a vacuum; well, DGobs abhors actors, actresses, musicals, and most-things theatrical, so I’m pretty sure these were my last moments onstage as an actress. Do with those memories what you will.